Posted By: ddker on

Friday, October 10th, 2008, 8:09 am

Things I Learned From Watching Business Ethics


1. If you want to get more breaks during the workday then take up smoking.

2. Andy took Intro to Philosophy twice.

3. Holly needs to be more like Robin Shyamalan.

4. Very strongly agree is below totally agree.

5. Pam is not a virgin.

6. Dunder Mifflin is Meredith's main source of money.

7. It only takes 19 minutes and 48 seconds out of your workday to have a rendezvous with a co-worker in the warehouse.

8. Michael would tell someone "I told you so" the funny way.

9. Dwight is a thief of joy.

10. Be prepared to get tackled when you announce your engagement to others.

Tags: business, things, learned, office, ethics

Posted By: ddker on

Friday, September 26th, 2008, 8:39 pm

Things I Learned From Watching Weight Loss


1. Holly is a major dork.

2. Pam weighs 226 pounds.

3. Friends don't talk about other friends' butts.

4. Every little boy fantasizes about his fairytale wedding.

5. If your company is having a weight loss competition, replace all the snacks in the vending machine with fruits and vegetables, and be sure to keep spraying to keep flys away.

6. Angela hasn't seen Andy naked.

7. When doing weekly weigh-ins, stand on the same place on the scale for the same amount of weight distribution.

8. Michael told the office he was the dad of Jan's baby.

9. You might get nauseous if someone picks up and carries around the laptop of the computer that you are watching the webcam of.

10. Michael went 28 years without sex.

11. If Angela gains weight, she will die.

12. Men from Scranton are handsome.

13. Kevin and Jim are on Ryan's list.

14. Kelly and Darryl are crazy in love.

15. You can force someone to exercise by dropping them off in a bad part of town and make them walk back.

16. People probably like Phyllis' jugs.

17. The Little Drummer Boy is bigger than Christmas.

18. Creed likes Kelly's butt.

19. Sometimes the best time to propose to your girlfriend is at a gas station, in the rain.

Tags: weight, office, loss, learned, things

Posted By: ddker on

Saturday, May 17th, 2008, 9:26 pm

Things I Learned From Watching Goodbye, Toby

1. Not all monsters are bad, like E.T.

2. Creed doesn't know what he does.

3. You can love someone at first see with ears.

4. Toby has been cruisin' for a bruisin' for 12 years.

5. WWII was 50 years ago.

6. Michael is on propecia and acutane.

7. If unable to find a place that sells anti-gravity, an anti-depressant place will work.

8. Pam is so clearly awesome.

9. You can get a runner's high from party planning.

10. Ryan's real crime was the beard and not the fraud.

11. You should carry a ring in your wallet for several years because you never know when you'll meet that special person.

12. Michael is a song parody writer.

13. HR is a breeding ground for monsters.

14. Kelly wants to visit Ryan in prison.

15. Hazing is a way of showing that you don't like a new person.

16. Holly is sweet and simple like a lady baker.

17. A good going away present for someone is a rock and a watch.

18. The office is a great place to court someone.

19. If your girlfriend gets pregnant and it's not yours, it doesn't always mean that she cheated.

Tags: office, the, learned, goodbye, things

Posted By: ddker on

Friday, May 9th, 2008, 12:03 pm

Things I Learned From Watching Job Fair

1. Your hands may get badly blistered after hitting 1200 practice shots for golf.

2. Blank sheet of paper = endless possibilites

3. Creed gets his work done months ahead of time.

4. If unable to pick up a bottle of beer, drink it through a straw.

5. People love their junk mail.

6. Darryl looks like Barack Obama.

7. Pam went to Valley View High School.

8. A company may get interns to euthenize the work place.

9. To save a 20 mile round trip, take extra paper to a job fair.

10. The American work day ends at 5pm.

11. Don't let Andy drive a golf cart.

12. PMS is a great excuse to get out of volleyball or basketball.

13. Angela's extention is 128.

14. If you hate your golf lessons, just hang out with the sailing club and get your naut on.

15. Kids are wary of being lured because of Dateline.

Tags: fair, learned, office, job, things

Posted By: ddker on

Friday, May 2nd, 2008, 7:20 pm

Things I Learned From Watching Did I Stutter?

1. Darryl was in 5 gangs.

2. Stanley doesn't respect Michael.

3. Toby is so white.

4. Pam's middle name is Morgan.

5. X-Terra's are chick magnets.

6. Many jazz cats are blind.

7. Gangs use 'fluffy fingers' aka tickling, to get along.

8. Ryan thrives on constructive criticism.

9. Yellow stands for cowardness.

10. Pam is Michael's translater for 'Kelly talk'.

11. Stanley is a beautiful, sassy, powerful guy.

12. Creed wants to see Pam topless.

13. MGS= Michael Gary Scott or Mark Greg Sputnik

Tags: stutter, things, learned, the, office